Archive for October, 2005

Go ahead, Rosa.

This place needs a design and it needs a purpose. There’s nothing worse than a purposeless activity, except one that has a superficial purpose, one that we’ve bought into to make us feel purposeful. Such is the way of many web sites—and for that matter, many of life’s activities. A life of wasted time doesn’t sound like fun to me, and I suspect it doesn’t to you, either. Making a web site is easy but I don’t intend to keep it going if it has no purpose.

So, Kathleen, I’d like to make this place meaningful and I think you would, too. If we cannot, let’s close it now before it takes on the appearance of purpose.

And now some definitions:

• meaningful: having a meaning or purpose (boy, that’s useful, ain’t it?)
• meaning: inner significance
• purpose: the object toward which one strives or for which something exists; an aim or a goal
• significant: having or likely to have a major effect; important;
• important: of great value

Here’s how I’d like to proceed. Please let me know your thoughts. First, I like the idea of working this out publicly as I am doing right now, almost as if this was an open letter to you (funny since we live together). I presume that we aren’t the only two people on earth who struggle with purpose—in life or web sites—so I think it would be useful to keep this dialogue public and open to scrutiny. Having it public also provides a small layer of accountability. That is, if it were not public I don’t know if I would do it at all. One more push over the cliff.

Also, I want to live openly from here on out. I have too many scars in my past to live the rest of my life as a secret. Let’s be smart about it, sure, but let’s be vulnerable. What is the value of being vulnerable and open?

Vulnerability requires courage. It says to the world, “I am not afraid of what you think or say about me because I know who I am and I know where my value lies.”

Vulnerability requires strength. Not inner strength because we both know that’s a lie. But strength that comes from the one who loves us. That need for strength means we must abide.

Vulnerability requires honesty. If I want to speak the truth to others I must be willing to speak the truth about who I am. Not so others can dangle my flaws in front of my face (because my past is dead) but in order to be trusted as one who speaks the truth.

Vulnerability requires humility. I must be willing to say I don’t have all the answers and I’m not always right. I must be willing to own mistakes. I must put the needs of others above my own.

Vulnerability requires love. True love is willing to risk ridicule and persecution.

And so, what is the fruit of strength, honesty, humility, and love? I believe it’s the type of integrity of character that breeds maturity, wisdom, and faith.

To get back to my earlier point, the second thing I’d like to do is define the most important thing. What is our goal? And if this site cannot be used to help us achieve that goal, we should close it and do something of value. Do you agree?

Third, I’m not convinced that a blog (a list of chronological posts and links) is the right frame for this house. If we decide to keep the site, I’d like to brainstorm ideas with you about making the site fit our purpose. And only then create a style to cover the house. Yes, I believe form follows function.

I also believe we should do something that allows us to be absorbed in it. It can be both fun and serious, but if it becomes a chore we won’t sustain it. If we are convinced of its value we should create something sustainable and we should use it.

That’s all I’ve got right now but I think these are important questions to answer before we begin. I’m tired of believing the world’s wisdom, that a few mindless activities won’t kill us. Sure, one or two. It’s okay to be entertained. But not kept in check we become consumed with mindless activities, buying mindless, purposeless crap, reading, listening, watching, doing purposeless things. And then we’re on our death bed wondering where all the time went.

And some things have not, eh? Ha. Ha ha. Ha ha ha …