Harry & my first big shift with food came as a result of a year of very limited income.  We did not want to sacrifice quality or health and live off Top Ramen and mac & cheese, so to help stretch our food budget we either eliminated or significantly reduced consumption of meat, juice, alcohol, and other unhealthy foods.  We also stopped eating out or buying coffee and pastries (one of our favorite weekend traditions), apart from special or rare occasions.

Through that year we got quite used to eating this way and maintained many of the habits once Harry had a full-time job.  I don’t enjoy handling nor cooking most meat so the only forms I began incorporating semi-regularly were ground buffalo and wild salmon.  Additionally, I learned much more about gardening, had a huge amount of bed space to do so, and quickly fell in love with growing food.  Last summer and fall I barely ever bought vegetables at the market because our garden produced enough for our family, and often enough to share or store.  This perpetuated our mostly vegetarian diet because it was the most convenient, healthy and economical way for us to eat.  I also believe this helped me become a much better, more flexible cook.  I had to learn new ways to use the same vegetable without us going crazy at the sight of it or how to incorporate a bunch of random veggies into a dish before they went bad.  I now have several meals that I can cook without following a recipe that work as great vehicles for leftover produce (homemade pizza, pasta dishes, salads, enchiladas, frittatas, etc…)

The next steps we took came because of articles, books, and discussions about the food industry.  Not fast food (we’d watched SupersizeMe years prior and have successfully avoided McDs, as well as most of it’s equals, since), but the major players behind most “food” products on the USA grocery stores shelves.  Food, Inc. was probably the most powerful catalyst for change, but Pollan’s articles/books and other key players in the slow food movement have all contributed to our baby steps.  Each bit of knowledge has led to either a softening towards change or immediate change.  It’s definitely a bit like peeling an onion-layer after layer reveals something new, usually equally pungent.  Sometimes we’re ready to digest what we learn, other times we’re not.

We have found the process extremely rewarding.  I am really enjoying providing healthier, more sustainable food options for our family that are balanced out by delicious treats.  (In our home, very little sugar in the three big meals a day leaves plenty of room for some sweet treats as snacks!) I am definitely doing a lot more dishes, pots & pans nearly every meal, but the truth is that only adds about 5 minutes of clean-up per meal.  I have grown very accustomed to the bulk food sections of stores and now know which stores I can no longer shop at for just about anything.  Recently, several grocery store clerks looked at me like I was crazy after asking if they had spelt flour.  One questioned whether it truly existed and followed up that question with “Is it for Passover?”  So funny.  Also, none of us are missing our old breakfast staples like I anticipated.  We are enjoying our oatmeal, granola, pancakes or eggs for breakfast.  Charlie has stopped asking for boxed mac & cheese unless he sees it in the grocery store.  He got it as a treat with a babysitter one night and we’ve decided it’ll be saved for just that occasion for two reasons, to please the child’s palate and help us get out the door without tears.   I have seen substantial improvement in his willingness to try new foods and eat what’s put before him.  This has probably been a big enough reward in itself to keep us motivated.

It’s an exciting time for us with the baby on the way but I feel like these changes are sustainable.  Additionally, we will probably have groceries delivered to home for awhile, which along with buying a bit more time and keeping healthy foods coming our way, will probably lower our grocery bill because there won’t be any impulse purchases.  I’ve also stocked our freezer with lots of beans, soups and breads that we can pull out as needed.  (To help prevent us from going to the grocery store and buying a frozen pizza, for example…but again, there’s room for grace.  There will undoubtedly be those days.)  There are no vegetables growing in pots on our front porch, like I’d hoped to have, and at this point I wonder if I’d have any chance of keeping them alive.  (I think we’ll be ready for summer veggies but missed the cool weather spring veggie window.)  I am sad I won’t be able to rely on my own produce like I could last year, but hey, at least we’re in Seattle surrounded by farmer’s markets in every neighborhood come May!  And the year-long Ballard market is so fantastic.  It helps tremendously to be in a community filled with believers in the importance of changing our food system, and even moreso to have close friends walking the same path, sharing recipes and meals with us.  (Have you watched Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution?  Such a great start…)

Harry and I are not black and white about this, and Harry’s particularly good at keeping me gray given my tendency to be all-or-nothing about choices.  We’re going to eat whatever meals people share with us and be thankful for that time of fellowship and food.  We’re going to enjoy meals at restaurants.  And while we’d like to support restaurants that avoid factory farmed meat, it won’t always happen or be possible.  (We are discovering that vegetarian options at restaurants often taste better, though!)  We’re striving to do our best but there’s plenty of room for grace.  This is a journey.  We understand that others may not agree, are at different spots in their own journey, or don’t know about the situation.  It is all relatively new to us, too, and we’re very aware of how much more we have to learn.  We love to dialogue about it and have gleaned tremendous amounts of insight from those further along this road, as well as from those who aren’t on it at all.

There is so much more to write about, but I’ll end with a little of what has been required to make this happen: careful time management and planning of social events during the week, a definite dedication to cooking, reading more recipes to expand my repertoire, and initially, more trips to grocery stores because I couldn’t find things I needed at certain ones.  It all requires a mindfulness that wasn’t necessary when I knew I had some packaged item in the freezer we could cook up.  In a crunch, stovetop oatmeal or plain whole wheat pasta just isn’t as appealing as potstickers and frozen pizza.

Our to-do list is slowly getting smaller.  What we have completed in the past three months makes my head spin a bit.  I’m going to do some self-indulgent reflecting on all of these tasks for a minute: house ready for market, maintaining cleanliness & neatness for showings, Harry interviewing, lining up movers, packing our stuff-including sorting, donating, shredding, etc…, celebrating holidays and birthdays, moving, finding a rental, unpacking, finding midwives & doctors and going to appointments, registering our car, getting driver’s licenses, surviving all of us being sick, finding a dentist, finding a preschool, Charlie’s third birthday, dealing with a water back-up in the basement and no washing machine for a week, dealing with a broken dryer for nearly two weeks,  getting insurance quotes, trying to find someone to cover our vacant home, and probably a zillion other things I’ve forgotten because half of my brain is somewhere near the interstate in Utah.  Plus, just regular life stuff like laundry, cooking, playing with and nurturing Charlie, and getting groceries.  And Harry adjusting to a new job.  Oh yeah, and I’m 33 weeks pregnant and feeling rather large.  Please know that I’m aware how whiney that all could sound.  While it has been exhausting,  I know our problems and task lists are luxurious and that most people would love to trade us for their own.  I’m just wanting to record this so that I’m reminded of how well cared for we’ve been during such a full period of life.  It is not a complaint, although admittedly I have entered that zone many times during the past few months.

The harder times have been well balanced with lots of beautiful, fun, and exciting times, like enjoying conversation and meals with friends, exploring our new neighborhood in our old city, savoring delicious coffee and baked goods, relishing being back at our church, and soaking in the most beautiful February week Seattle has ever known.  (I don’t know if that’s really true, but it has been phenomenal.)  What I have learned these past three months is to rely more deeply on God’s provision.  He provided for us in amazing ways by getting us here so quickly and ultimately with perfect timing (although we couldn’t see this at the time).  Our friends and church here have taken such good care of us- helping us with everything from providing places to sleep, meals, unpacking, playdates, to sanding and priming tables for goodness sake!

On one of the beautiful days this week Charlie and I took his bike out for a spin.  Since we were out of beans we stopped at Macrina for me to grab some java.  Charlie entered and Ellen, who is probably his favorite worker there (and she admits to having a crush on Charlie), happily greeted him and commented on his cool helmet.  He proudly displayed it for her and proceeded to tell her that his bike is cool too and that he’d like a treat.  He is really comfortable in stores now and loves to order his own items, with or without his parents’ permission.  Thankfully, the workers usually confirm with us.  After Macrina and some playground time we biked back home, only to see backhoes and dumptrucks down the street.  Charlie and I ended up sitting on someone’s stairs for nearly a half hour so he could watch.  Near the end of our stay he started playing his sippy cup like a guitar and called it his milk guitar.  He cheerfully made up a song, played air guitar and watched the backhoe.  The sun was shining, an enormous cherry tree was within my view, the Olympics were also within sight and all was perfect.  Well, except for the fresh, wet bird poop that was on the stairs right next to us, tempting Charlie to finger paint.

After having read a summary of the book, engaging in conversations with many friends about it, and wanting to read it for months, I FINALLY have “Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child” in my hands!!!  I am so excited.  I feel like this could be one of the most important books Harry and I read as parents because implementing Gottman’s ideas into our parenting might be the most emotionally formative choice we make.  I am already slightly familiar with some of his principles from my graduate school training, particularly the counseling course, and have tried to acknowledge and validate Charlie’s emotions, so I’m thankful that I don’t feel like I’m being repeatedly hit over the head with all of the ways I’ve parented poorly.  But, geez, it’s humbling.  It is such a balance to keep their emotions in mind, respect their needs and desires, and still get out the door in time for appointments.  Maybe this is why we were late to our first visit to the new pediatrician.  Yes, it was that I favored emotional well-being over promptness, that’s it!

After doing research on pediatric dentists and discovering that those recommended by friends here or ranked high on the websites I viewed were not in our plan, I called a random dentist office today and asked about his pediatric experience.  His receptionist actually said, “Well, he’s getting better.  [I'm silent in disbelief and she continues]   He has a four year old now and he seems to be more understanding.”  Clearly, not someone I’m going to send him to, especially after reading the Gottman book 12 hours prior!  I get off the phone, talk with Aaron about our completed coffee tables (I am *so* excited to have these sanded & primed, ready for our fun new paint colors!), and he recommended their dentist.  In our plan, scheduled perfectly, and with a view of Puget Sound!  At least one of us will enjoy that part.  And I can reward Charlie with a trip to the beach after his dental visits.

Lastly, I have been thinking a lot about America’s food industry.  I watched a few more clips (one was a Katie Couric interview with Dr. Kessler and Eric Schlosser, another was a TED.org lecture with Jamie Oliver, and the last was a Michael Pollan lecture available on hulu.com) and engaged in conversation with Angie about Eating Animals, a book she’s reading.  I am becoming increasingly convinced that our food choices are not only important for our health and for the environment, but for the well-being of our neighbors…mostly our poor, third-world, developing country neighbors who are at the mercy of our choices.  Taking the steps to live more sustainably and responsibly are not easy.  They require giving up convenience (boxed cereal in the morning or stovetop oatmeal? mac & cheese for kids or a prepared lunch?), weaning ourselves off the sugar and salt we’re accustomed to in processed foods, and learning to find entertainment and pleasure outside of eating out at restaurants that serve questionable food (which is most of the affordable ones).  We’re going to take a few more small steps…starting with getting rid of cereal and macaroni and cheese.  We’re going to regularly have stovetop oatmeal and alternate with granola.  I’m going to try to make some homemade mac & cheeses and see if Charlie takes to any of them, but if not, he’ll slowly forget about his love for the boxed wonder.  And we’ll all be healthier because of it.

Alright, I’m not editing this, so my apologies for errors.  I’m tired but I want to post.  Good night!

Thanksgiving lends itself to much beauty, not the least of which is that it encourages so many people to stop and think about what they’re thankful for before they stuff themselves silly.  I celebrate this part of Thanksgiving and love that it is a part of Harry and my tradition to share these thoughts.  Additionally, I like that it’s a call to return to or strengthen a practice of meditating regularly on our blessings.  Without giving thanks, I am sure to grow bitter, forgetful, and weary.

There is also plenty about Thanksgiving with which I don’t care to identify or celebrate.  I just read this article about the historical atrocities associated with this holiday and reminded of how deep the pain runs for many Native Americans when our nation recognizes only the happily-presented (elementary school version that many adults still believe) pilgrim part of the story.  Highlighting his years of being bonded by anger, the author’s last line is perfect:  “And we’ll give thanks that we live in a country where remembering the past need not shackle us to it.”  It seems a good balance to discuss the truth and then choose to celebrate the ways that love has triumphed over hate, thankfulness over ungratefulness.

I also find it difficult to swallow the costs associated with Thanksgiving–physically, financially, environmentally, and sadly, for many, spiritually and emotionally–that could be lessened by making a few changes.  (I feel this way about Christmas, too…particularly store bought obligatory gifts.)  I’m all in favor of a local, organic, sustainable Thanksgiving meal.  Not a feast, but a minimalist, stress-free meal that allows people to engage in relational activities and enjoy the day.  This does not have to be any more expensive than a conventional meal.  In fact, by not having a turkey (which wouldn’t bother me one bit), the costs are decreased significantly.  If turkey is a must, getting a heritage turkey seems worth the extra cost.  I’ve heard the flavor is significantly better (maybe I’d actually want turkey annually if I tried one of them) and they’re not packed with hormones.  In fact, they can actually reproduce on their own.  (Isn’t it horrifying that conventional turkeys can’t reproduce!?)  You could cut costs elsewhere by having fewer sides, no alcohol, etc…  Or, don’t eat meat for a few weeks prior and after.  This would also help off-set the environmental impact of the holiday.  We have a very long way to go in celebrating this way, but I believe it is a gift to the world to do so.  It is an acknowledgment that our choices impact the whole world and by choosing simplicity, we are respecting our global neighborhood.

So, I’m done with my truth sharing and moving on towards focusing on love.  We have so much to be thankful for that it’s almost embarrassing.  Yesterday I had a twenty week ultrasound for our littlest Love.  The baby is healthy and growing well, already 11 inches and over 300 grams.  (It also seems to be following in Charlie’s shoes for head size.  Great…can’t wait for labor again.)  The appointment length was going to make Harry’s work day challenging and we both opted for him to stay at work.  So that we could still learn the baby’s gender at the same time, I arranged for a bakery near Harry’s office to prepare a half dozen chocolate coconut cupcakes for a boy and strawberry milkshake ones for a girl.  The ultrasound tech had me turn my head every time I could’ve been informed, praising me all the while for doing a good job not cheating.  She was pretty cute in how proud she seemed of me.  And she was happy to make the call even though she’d never been asked to do so before.   Harry met me at the bakery after the appointment and we eagerly opened up our box and tearfully celebrated our news with a pair of really delicious cupcakes and shots of espresso.  After a few minutes by ourselves, the delightful Tee and Cakes owner, Kim, generously brought us a onesie for the baby.  The staff there couldn’t have treated us better.  I think they liked being in on the secret.  And they probably liked my tears, too.

A few of many other things that keep me singing praises, in no particular order:

Sweet baby Caroline, who has triumphed through a very rough first year of life that included heart failure, feeding tubes, and open heart surgery.  She is as cute as a button and melts your heart with her smile.  She is recovering beautifully and beginning to really hit her stride.  Her parents,  my dear friend Leslie and her husband Mike, have been amazing.  They have inspired me countless times with their optimism, endurance, strength, advocacy, and profound love.

Our friends Lonnie and Juliet finally got to pick up their son from Ethiopia and now have him in their arms on a daily basis.  I got the pleasure of meeting Daniel in October and almost couldn’t believe that he’s cuter in person than he is in his pictures, because his pictures turn me into jello.  The kid is as adorable as they come.  Brightest eyes I’ve ever seen.  Man, I want to hold him right now!  It is such exquisite beauty to see friends who have longed for a family holding their baby in their arms.

My core group girls.  I have absolutely loved getting to know these college women by having them into our home regularly for study and fellowship.  Had I known I would be pregnant or that we might be moving, I probably wouldn’t have signed up to lead a group.  It has deeply enriched these past few months for me.  They have taught me so much with their passion, exuberance, energy, vulnerability, and eagerness to grow.  I will dearly miss meeting with them if we move.  You girls better take a road trip!

Harry’s job.  While it has created a new source of difficulties, it allowed us to stay in our house, rebuild our savings a bit, and take a deep sigh of relief after our year of limited income.  It also gave us the freedom to feel like we could start trying for another child.  Now, it seems, it might be leading us to another source of thankfulness…a return to Seattle.

While leaving Colorado will be heart-breaking and extremely difficult on many levels, we are thankful that jobs exist in Seattle for Harry’s line of work.  If we had to move somewhere else, I can’t imagine how upset I’d be.  But a return to Seattle feels like a return home.  We have never stopped missing our friends and church.  We also have discovered that we’re not suburbia folks…we like city life, even the nitty-gritty.  It is only in the joy of returning to people we dearly miss and love that we can face the pain of leaving others behind.

With that, I hope you all find a moment to reflect on what is good, beautiful, and loving in your life.  If you have read this entire post, you are certainly a good friend to me!  Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Seattle to Boulder from Harry Love and Vimeo.

What are you happiest about?

Kathleen: Having a baby.
Harry: Yep, I concur.

What’s the baby’s name?

Kathleen: Justin Uhlotta
Harry: Asurp Rize

No, really:

Kathleen: …
Harry: …

Share a memorable laugh you had:

Kathleen: Photo booth pictures
Harry: More photo booth pictures
(yeah, we did this for hours)

If you could walk through any door, what would you like it to open to?

Kathleen: My gut-reaction response is that it would open to our little boy…sans labor & delivery! On a deeper level, I’d love to walk through the many doors of unbelief, pride, and fear that keep me from experiencing life to its fullest. However, I’m also thankful that this journey involves a more dynamic path.

Harry: Sainte-Chapelle, the night we saw the concert there; Zoka, my favorite coffee shop.

Who is your favorite neighborhood cat?

Kathleen: Even though he sprayed my friend, Copper takes the cake (for letting me rub his enormous belly on a regular basis).

Harry: Tough call, but I gotta go with Chester.

Will you be happy to say goodbye to anything from 2006?

Kathleen: Pregnancy-induced heartburn.
Harry: TV.

Who has inspired you?

Kathleen: Countless people, including strangers, friends, and family, through beautiful acts of generosity, perseverance through difficult times, faithfulness, and sacrifice. Maya Angelou’s Seattle visit, during which she recited poetry, sang, and shared about life, was also deeply inspirational to me.

Harry: Kathleen: it’s been amazing to watch her experience pregnancy. Guy Kawasaki: I read The Art of the Start in 2005 and now I follow his blog. Very motivating. Maya Angelou was fantastic.

When do you feel like time flies?

Kathleen: Dates with Harry. Watching our son move in my belly. Reflecting on the past year.
Harry: Reading. Watching movies.

Any favorite movies or videos?

Kathleen: Millions, Akeelah and the Bee.

Harry: Casino Royale, Tony vs. Paul, everyday, Martians Descend on Sesame Street, Bein’ Green, Evolution, Pythagora Switch, Imagination.

Any favorite music or books?

Kathleen: Some Wildflower in my Heart. Re-reading Maya Angelou’s early autobiographical works. I’ve continued to play many of the same albums from last year over and over again this year: Garden State Soundtrack, Illinois by Sufjan Stevens, How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb by U2, and anything by Coldplay. Harry also made me a fantastic iTunes digital album for Christmas that will probably be overplayed during 2007.

Harry: The Tale of the Unknown Island, Worldchanging: A User’s Guide for the 21st Century (still reading this one), The Game Design Reader: A Rules of Play Anthology (still reading this one, too), Slouching Towards Bethlehem by Joni Mitchell, Understand by Pete Rock (watch out, this might be too funky for you), and most recently, Black and Blue and Numb All Over by Graig Markel. Also, by way of video: Drifting, and The Wind and the Wheat.

Favorite web sites?

Kathleen: I’m not much of a web surfer, so my vote is for my email account. Harry always shows me funny sites, so I get to see the good stuff without searching for it.
Harry: Line Rider, Animator vs. Animation (choose Watch this Movie)

Other than the baby, what are you looking forward to this year?

Kathleen: I could write paragraphs to answer this question…but I’ll spare us all the time! Instead, in a nutshell: growth and development in my relationships and new roles, watching the same in others, Harry launching his business, and returning to gardening & physical activities (besides waddling around the lake).

Harry: Opening the doors to my web business (still under development). Ocean’s 13. Writing more. Adding more fiction to my non-fiction-leaning book list.

As always, we update Loveoirs from time to time with our thoughts so you can keep up with what we’re doing. When the little boy is born we will post an update here, so check back in the first few weeks of February. Our photos are still on Flickr. Here’s a collection of some of our favorite memories from 2006.

We wish you all the best in 2007. We hope you get at least some of the best. We’ll rock-paper-scissors you for it.

So, need STP registrations? We’ve got 2 to sell, including reserved spots for bikes on the buses back to Seattle. We’ll take the best offer we get.

We now hope to do our first STP in a year, two, or ten… but it’s going to happen!

58 miles!!! This route was essentially the ride we completed yesterday, except we avoided the highways and were closer to Lake Washington.

With less than two months until we cycle the 204 miles (in 2 days) from Seattle to Portland, this should become an easy ride for us. It didn’t feel that way yesterday at times, but I’m glad I can still walk today, and imagine I could’ve hopped back on my bike today if needed, even though my saddle might not appreciate it.

So far, between all of my training rides, the most interesting sights have been dog related:
1) little dog (possibly chihuahua) in backpack while helmeted owner is cycling fast on a road bike- poor dog would’ve flown far and been flattened in an accident, but it sure looked cute
2) big, black dog wearing aviation goggles while being pulled in a kid’s carrier
3) Jack Russell terrier in bottom of stroller while chihuahua is sitting in the top part; “mom” pushing them both

Of course, I am biased. I have read her works with awe and gratitude since high school, one of the few authors whom I sought for that long without obligation from teachers. I even deferred admission to Wake Forest, where she’s on faculty, hoping that someday I could learn directly from her. That still makes me shiver, but meeting Harry, going to Siberia, meeting my college friends, and allowing my dad’s retirement to occur before 80 certainly outweigh that scant possibility.

Anyways, her voice and message were rich. She alternated between sharing her own life experiences and reading poetry (both her own and others) to encourage us to believe in our unique gifts, see our potential to be rainbow amidst others’ clouds, and be thankful for those who have done so for us. She shared that without rainbows in our clouds, none of us could say “Good morning” everyday. None of us could continue through life keeping our heads high. At the end of the night, the woman sitting next to me, who came by herself, tearfully told me she really needed to hear Maya’s messsage. I could see in her eyes that she had been in a desperate place and was leaving it. I may never cross paths with this woman again, but she blessed me that night through her vulnerability. I believe she left changed, encouraged, and renewed. I believe this was the case for most of the audience. What incredible work.

This is what I want to remember to strive for: to be like Maya was for the audience, so that each person I encounter may know they are loved, unique, and special. In the midst of the daily grind, it is hard to remember that this is so important. Not only for our loved ones, but for strangers. For those whom a simple “Good morning” could make their day.